Flashback: an unfortunate date

I think it's been long enough now that I don't have to worry about the poor guy finding my webpage and reading about himself, so I'm going to tell you about a rather unpleasant date I had in the spring.

It started out promisingly - as I was going to meet Svetlana for supper in Dupont Circle, I heard someone saying "excuse me" in my direction as I walked toward the metro escalator. I turned around, thinking I'd dropped something, and this guy asked me if I worked close to Metro Center. "Well, yeah, why?" I said. It turns out he did, too, and had seen me around the neighborhood and wanted to meet me. How cute!

We're chatting while we each wait for the people we're meeting and I'm thinking, "He's kind of short, but seems smart and has pretty colored eyes, this could be nice!" I mention that I'm meeting Svetlana and she walks up to us right then. Turns out, he's met her before, years ago, through her brother. After I give him my number and we walk away, she tells me, "He called me a few times after I met him, but I didn't want to call him back." So, that was kind of a downer, but it's not his fault he's my friend's cast-off, so I wanted to give him a chance.

We decided to meet after work the next Thursday and go look at the cherry blossoms. The day was beyond freezing, however, so he suggested drinks instead. Lima was having a promotional special with free samples of gin drinks, so I tried a couple of those. My date, however, decided to see my couple and raise me god knows how many. He started to get drunk, and I started to get bored and hungry.

I asked if we were going to eat supper since it was getting to be kind of late. He was sort of agreeable, but said he'd rather go to a club. Sigh. I love nightclubs, but not EVER in the place of a meal. EVER. He wants to walk to the place, but it's about 20 degrees, so I insist upon a cab. He has me pay, which was fine, I guess, but he didn't have to pay for my drinks either (though he did pay for his). So thus far I've paid my own way on a date he asked me on. Not terrible, but I was starting to feel kind of let down, I have to admit.

Svetlana gives me a buzz while we're at the club and invites us to play pool with her and her date across the street. Why not? I just didn't feel the clubby vibe right then anyway. So we go over and start to play doubles. I realized just how bad things had gotten when my poor date could barely stand up to shoot. Next thing I know, he's half asleep on one of the couches. Svetlana's like, "What happened to him?!"

So we leave, and the four of us decide to go out for just a little while longer to dance, cos why not? Supper was a distant dream by then anyway. Mr. Right nearly falls going up the stairs as we leave, and I'm thinking at least I got to hang out with my girlfriend tonight.

At this point it has become so late that the metro is about to close down, and I've got no car and no more cash for a cab. I say to my Prince Charming, "I need to leave immediately if I'm going to catch the last train!" He reassures me, "Don't worry about getting home - I'll take care of it."

After another hour or so, the four of us are standing outside, ready to go. I say goodbye to Svet and her guy and look at my date. "OK, I'm sorry to do this, but I need to rely on you to get home, you said you'd take care of it." I'll admit I knew he didn't have a car (though it kind of annoyed me, I can't be turning people down for dates just because they don't have cars), but I thought he might pay my share of a cab ride. It didn't seem like that outlandish of a hope considering he'd probably spent $4 on me the entire night.

No. No no no. He wanted me to walk the two miles home with him and stay overnight on his couch ("I'll leave you alone, I swear") and then get up at 5 AM when the trains started running again to take one home before work. I asked him if he was serious. He assured me that he was. I turned around and looked pleadingly at Svetlana.

Keep in mind this is one of her first dates with her guy. She kind of wanted him to drop her off without a leechy friend in tow. But she saw my straits and said, "Oh Ginger, don't worry, Sam can drive you home." I looked at my own Knight, who looked bleary and crestfallen, but knew he had no argument. "Sorry, I'm going with them. Talk to you later." We had a hug, and walked opposite ways. I was pretty much past the point of worrying how he was going to get home.

I tagged along while Sam dropped Svetlana off (is there any worse time to be a third wheel than when one half of the couple is dropping the other half off? I don't think so), then hopped in the front and got my ride home. Both of them were SO nice about it, but I felt stupid, and I felt like it was my date's fault for putting me in that position.

In case you were wondering, I was pretty much delirious with hunger by the time I got home! You're lucky I'm still with you on this side of starvation!

Rather surprisingly, Casanova called me the next week and asked to have lunch. I, despite my better judgment, agreed, but suggested a different day. I called him on the day at about noon, and he said, "Oh, I'm sorry, my company is catering lunch today. Maybe some other time?" Really? Was he ever going to call and tell me he had to cancel? When he called the next week, I just didn't pick up.

This sort of taking me for granted and not putting in any kind of effort seems to be a common theme in my dating life lately. So I just don't date anymore. It's been months now and I don't miss it. At least when I hang out alone, I always get supper.